10. Before You Set Your 2023 Goals
The New Year is an exciting time filled with hope about how next year is going to be better or different, and all the things we’re finally going to make happen. However, while you might be focused on what could be, have you considered what has been?
There’s one essential thing you need to do before setting goals for 2023, and that is to examine your 2022 story. Your current story has so much to offer you and will provide valuable answers for how you want to approach 2023, so right now is the perfect time to take a close look.
Join me this week to discover how our stories are created, and why it is vital for you to intentionally decide what your 2022 story is before thinking about next year. You’ll hear why your story is completely up to you, what happens when you give it intentional attention, and how to start showcasing yourself as the hero of your story.
If you missed the enrollment period for my group coaching program Out of Overwhelm, you’re in luck. I am reopening the doors leading up to our virtual kickoff retreat on January 10th, 2023. This opportunity won’t be available again until summer, so click here to learn more and claim your spot.
To celebrate the launch of the show, I’m giving away gift cards to Jayson Home, one of my favorite home decor sources. All you have to do to become one of the five lucky listeners to win is follow, rate, and review this podcast.
Please leave your honest feedback, and click here to learn how to enter!
What You’ll Discover from this Episode:
How our stories are created.
2 reasons why you have to intentionally decide what your 2022 story is before thinking about next year.
How to cultivate awareness around your 2022 story.
What happens when you set goals with a focus on what didn’t work, or what you did wrong or didn’t do.
High-quality questions you can ask yourself to get high-quality answers.
Listen to the Full Episode:
Featured on the Show:
Enter the podcast launch giveaway by leaving a rating and review! Click here to learn how to enter.
If you love what you’re learning on the show, I’d love for you to check out my signature group coaching program, Out of Overwhelm
Full Episode Transcript:
Hey designer, you’re listening to episode 10. This is the one where I’m sharing one of the most important things you can do before you set your 2023 goals.
Welcome to The Interior Design Business CEO, the only show for designers who are ready to confidently run and grow their businesses without the stress and anxiety. If you're ready to develop a bigger vision for your interior design business, free up your time, and streamline your days for productivity and profit, you're in the right place. I'm Desi Creswell, an award-winning interior designer and certified life and business coach. I help interior designers just like you stop feeling overwhelmed so they can build profitable businesses they love to run. Are you ready to confidently lead your business, clients, and projects? Let's go.
Hello designers, welcome back to the podcast. This is another episode I'm recording early because I'll be off on a family adventure when this airs. And let's be honest, I was definitely not going to try to bring any of my podcast equipment with me. Not just because I'm not planning to work during those two weeks away, but I also knew the likelihood of me messing up some kind of technology piece was incredibly high.
Technology is one of the number one things that I delegate in my business. Usually I can figure it out, but it is after so much trial and error and frustration and wanting to just quit that I've learned that this is a great way to invest my business funds.
And actually, as I was thinking about this I was thinking about being in the computer lab when I was studying interior design in college. And I swear every single time I would need to use that really large plotter to print out floor plans and different things for presentations, oh my gosh, I would always run into some error on this machine.
It was awful. I'd end up calling my boyfriend who's actually now my husband, or he'd send in his best friend who was an engineer to help me because I would just be at such a loss. And of course it'd be like the middle of the night in the computer lab, I didn't have the time management tools that I have today. Oh my gosh, the tears.
All right, so it's kind of ironic that I'm telling you a story about how bad I am with technology when today we're going to dive into the topic of the story you're telling yourself about this past year. And this is a really important topic and it needs to be discussed before you set your goals for next year.
Before we dive in, I am really excited because we have our first podcast winner today. This review was written by 438 smiley face, and they titled their review The Path Out. They shared, “Desi shares bite sized organized systems to follow when you have found yourself in the flurry of overwhelm. Logically laid out for you when it seems otherwise impossible to see where to begin.” All right, thank you so much 438 smiley face for leaving your review. I will be in touch with an email to get you your Jayson Home gift card.
If you want to win your very own $50 gift card to Jayson Home, you can still do that. All you have to do is rate and review the podcast and then you're going to enter the giveaway. All the instructions are at desicreswell.com/podcast launch. It’s super important to do that last step. I'm so appreciative of everyone who's left reviews and I want to make sure that you are entered in the giveaway.
And in order to be entered, you need to fill out this form that submits your email address with your review. Otherwise, I don't have a way to contact you. So definitely go to that link, submit your review, and be entered to win one of those gift cards. I'll be announcing the winners on our upcoming shows.
Let's dive into the topic. It's the end of the year and it's a great time to reflect, a lot of us are doing reflections, we are maybe checking out of office for a little bit. And it's also the time of year where we might also just be kind of calling it quits on last year. Kind of like, well, glad that's done, moving on. Or I'm going to just drop that like a hot potato and hope for better next year, right?
We get really excited about the new year and there's all that hope about how next year is going to be better, or different, or we're finally going to make those changes. But when you're only focused on what could be, you aren't taking into account the story you're dragging with you, and I really mean dragging with you, into the new year. And that's what we're going to talk about today.
It's kind of like this really heavy weight that you're walking around with, except you can't see the heavy weight. It's this invisible force that is dragging behind you, slowing you down, making you feel sluggish, and you have no idea it's there. That's why the first step in this process is to know what your current story is. You have to understand what that invisible weight is that you're dragging into the new year so you can drop it and release it, and move forward with more ease.
So thinking about what that current story is, what your story is about 2022. One of the ways I like to think about this is if you were writing a book about last year, what would the title be? If we could go to Barnes and Noble and scan the bookshelves, pull your book out, what would that title be if you had to create one for 2022? What would be the chapters that would be in that book?
And how would you, as the business owner, be portrayed as the main character? And then what about the supporting characters, maybe clients, contractors, employees, look at what their significance in the story is. And then I want you to take a moment and notice how you feel when you think about that story you're telling. A lot of times you're feeling not so great when you tell that story.
Maybe you're feeling defeated, or disappointed, or maybe there's even some regret. So we want to be aware of that starting point, that you are here point on the map. And awareness is always that first step, so start here.
Once you have awareness of your current story, you're going to decide what the story is you're going to tell yourself about the year that has just passed. This is really important for two reasons. How you intentionally decide to think about last year is actually going to determine your experience and the results you're able to create in the coming year. And that's why it's so important to do this before we ever set any new goals.
If you go back to episode three where I talk to you about the self-coaching model, you'll see why this is so important. And for those of you who need a refresher or haven't listened to that episode, let me give you a quick review. You have the neutral facts, or the circumstance, of what you did or didn't do last year. None of it is good or bad or not enough or too much, it just is what it is.
But then you, or your human brain assigns meaning to those facts. And this is where you have the opportunity to choose. This is where story is created. The facts are just the facts, it's what we make them mean that makes all of the difference. And what we make it mean is totally optional.
You get to choose what you make those facts mean about you, your business, and your future. And you get to choose the way you talk about yourself so that it serves you in 2023. So like I said, you've got your facts, your thoughts about those facts, and then your thoughts about those facts create a feeling. And those emotions are going to fuel action or inaction. And then, of course, our actions or inactions create the results that we have.
So, again, you have the circumstance or the thoughts, you have a thought about those circumstances which generates an emotion or a feeling. Which fuels your action or inaction and that produces a result.
So you can see that if you're thinking really crappy thoughts about last year, which is really just a story, a bunch of thoughts lumped together in one, you're going to get crappy results. You're going to just continue to find evidence to support that story in this coming year and then continue to create the results that you don't actually want. Most of us think that that will actually motivate us, and it is the exact opposite.
So many of my clients are used to using this internal dialogue as a source of motivation. And while it can work to some extent, it ends up burning you out and ultimately is not sustainable fuel for going after the goals you want in your business. When you're setting goals solely from a place of what you did wrong, or what didn't work, or what you didn't do, you're fueling your goal setting with judgment and pressure.
I want to compare and contrast something here, think about the types of goals you set and then the results that you get from setting goals from a feeling of pressure and the story of not good enough. When you're believing that last year wasn't good enough, the actions you're going to take for goal setting are going to be something along the lines of maybe listing out every possible thing you could ever do next year, piling on way too much work all at once and overwhelming yourself.
You maybe are treating yourself and your business as an improvement project versus something that's going to evolve and keep getting better from a place of it's already working really well. And you're going to get stressed pretty much immediately about all there is to do and how you don't have time to do any of it.
Let's contrast that to what it looks like to set a goal from the feeling of pride and the story of I made some great progress. When you're believing I made some great progress, you're going to take actions like maybe picking up on the subtleties and tweaks you could make to improve what's already going really well in your business and double down on that.
You're much more prone to be strategic and select a few key projects that will have the most impact in your business and move the needle forward without overworking. And you're going to be feeling good about taking action because you've allowed yourself to see what you've already created, what you're already capable of. And you can use that evidence to create internal motivation for yourself.
Do you see how different this is? One story keeps you stuck and spinning, the other story moves you forward powerfully. And this is why you have to decide what story you're going to tell about last year before you set goals for next year.
And if you're thinking, “I don't want to be delusional, I don't want to tell myself I did a great job when I really didn't,” I want you to question this. I'm not asking you to make up all the ways you're wonderful and invent accomplishments that aren't there. I'm asking you to see the truth of what is. There are multiple truths. It's all a story, you did some things, you didn't do some things. You really crushed it and you messed up.
I'm asking you to decide what you're going to give more attention to, because that part you're totally in control of. That is up to you. And it's going to be a determining factor in how you approach your goal setting for next year.
One of the skills I teach my clients is the skill of asking high quality questions to get high quality answers. As I've shared before, coaching or the process of coaching, whether it's from a coach or coaching yourself, is about thinking at a higher level. So to start to look at the story you want to tell about this past year, I want you to start asking yourself questions that empower you, that showcase you as the hero of your story.
You could ask yourself, what did you create or accomplish this year that did not exist the previous year? What did you learn in creating those things? And who did you get to become in the process of that creation? How have you grown as a business owner in the past year? Why are you proud of yourself? These are all great questions to be asking, and you're going to get great answers.
Instead of wasting time doubting yourself right now, I want you to start impressing yourself. There are absolutely things that went well, and when you ask yourself these questions you write a story that's going to serve you in the coming year. And decide what stories you're willing to let go of in order to create a new future for yourself.
If you want to dive deeper into reviewing your year and making a plan for next year, I encourage you to use the process of curious evaluation that I outlined in episode eight, the link will be in the show notes. When you go through this process of creating awareness around your current story and then intentionally deciding what you want to believe about last year, you are setting yourself up for success.
There's the tactical approach to setting doable achieving goals in my business that I always use and I teach my clients. But before that ever happens, I start here. You're going to feel proud and accomplished when you go through this process, which in turn creates more pride, more accomplishment, and more joy in your business. And you're going to get better results too.
As we close out another year and get ready to set goals for the coming year, this really is the best time to take a look at the stories you're telling yourself and make a conscious decision about the story you want to tell going forward. Do this exercise, I'd love to hear what comes up for you about the past, about the story you're going to tell and the future you're going to create.
In the next episode I'm going to be diving into my process for setting achievable goals, we're going to head more into the nitty gritty tactics. I can't wait to dive into that topic. It's one of my favorites. And until then I'm wishing you a beautiful week. I'll talk to you in the next episode.
---
Hey designer, I have a special announcement for you. I recently wrapped up enrollment for my six month group coaching program, Out of Overwhelm. Since closing the doors I’ve heard from several of you that with the busyness of the end the year you didn’t get around to applying or you let yourself sit in that decision limbo until it was just too late. So I’ve been thinking about you. I’m not planning to open the doors to the program again until summer 2023 and I don’t want anyone, especially you, to miss out on the opportunity to get the support you want as we head into the new year.
Out of Overwhelm is my signature six-month program designed to take you from overwhelmed and stressed to profitable, in control, and fulfilled. I’ve decided to reopen enrollment leading up to our virtual kickoff retreat on January 10th. If you love the topics I’m covering on the podcast, you are going to love out of overwhelm. It is where we take these tool and I give you a consistent structure for applying them and we create the exact results you want personally and professionally, and you get to do it all with my support alongside your peers.
So this is your official invitation to join an intimate community of designers where you’ll get my personalized feedback whenever you need it. During our group calls, our monthly focus sessions, and also with daily coaching from me within our online community platform, you’ll always be moving forward.
Head to desicreswell.com/group-coaching or click the link in the show notes for all of the details and to apply. I review the applications personally to ensure it’s the best fit. You can also request to schedule time for us to connect live so I can answer any questions you have.
With the starts of the new year there has never been better time get back in the driver sear of your business. Join me in Out of Overwhelm. Click the link in the show notes to apply and get started January 10.
---
To celebrate the launch of the show, I'm going to be giving away gift cards to Jayson Home, one of my favorite home decor sources. I'm going to be giving away $50 gift cards to five lucky listeners who follow, rate, and review the show.
Now, it doesn't have to be a five star review, although I sure hope you love the show. I want your honest feedback so I can create an amazing show that provides tons of value. Visit desicreswell.com/podcastlaunch to learn more about the contest and how to enter. I'll be announcing the winners on the show in an upcoming episode.
Thanks for joining me for this week's episode of The Interior Design Business CEO. If you want more tips, tools and strategies visit www.desicreswell.com. And if you're ready to take what you've learned on the podcast to the next level, I would love for you to check out my signature group coaching program, Out of Overwhelm.
Welcome to The Interior Design Business CEO, the only show for designers who are ready to confidently run and grow their businesses without the stress and anxiety. If you're ready to develop a bigger vision for your interior design business, free up your time, and streamline your days for productivity and profit, you're in the right place. I'm Desi Creswell, an award-winning interior designer and certified life and business coach. I help interior designers just like you stop feeling overwhelmed so they can build profitable businesses they love to run. Are you ready to confidently lead your business, clients, and projects? Let's go.
Hello designers, welcome back to the podcast. This is another episode I'm recording early because I'll be off on a family adventure when this airs. And let's be honest, I was definitely not going to try to bring any of my podcast equipment with me. Not just because I'm not planning to work during those two weeks away, but I also knew the likelihood of me messing up some kind of technology piece was incredibly high.
Technology is one of the number one things that I delegate in my business. Usually I can figure it out, but it is after so much trial and error and frustration and wanting to just quit that I've learned that this is a great way to invest my business funds.
And actually, as I was thinking about this I was thinking about being in the computer lab when I was studying interior design in college. And I swear every single time I would need to use that really large plotter to print out floor plans and different things for presentations, oh my gosh, I would always run into some error on this machine.
It was awful. I'd end up calling my boyfriend who's actually now my husband, or he'd send in his best friend who was an engineer to help me because I would just be at such a loss. And of course it'd be like the middle of the night in the computer lab, I didn't have the time management tools that I have today. Oh my gosh, the tears.
All right, so it's kind of ironic that I'm telling you a story about how bad I am with technology when today we're going to dive into the topic of the story you're telling yourself about this past year. And this is a really important topic and it needs to be discussed before you set your goals for next year.
Before we dive in, I am really excited because we have our first podcast winner today. This review was written by 438 smiley face, and they titled their review The Path Out. They shared, “Desi shares bite sized organized systems to follow when you have found yourself in the flurry of overwhelm. Logically laid out for you when it seems otherwise impossible to see where to begin.” All right, thank you so much 438 smiley face for leaving your review. I will be in touch with an email to get you your Jayson Home gift card.
If you want to win your very own $50 gift card to Jayson Home, you can still do that. All you have to do is rate and review the podcast and then you're going to enter the giveaway. All the instructions are at desicreswell.com/podcast launch. It’s super important to do that last step. I'm so appreciative of everyone who's left reviews and I want to make sure that you are entered in the giveaway.
And in order to be entered, you need to fill out this form that submits your email address with your review. Otherwise, I don't have a way to contact you. So definitely go to that link, submit your review, and be entered to win one of those gift cards. I'll be announcing the winners on our upcoming shows.
Let's dive into the topic. It's the end of the year and it's a great time to reflect, a lot of us are doing reflections, we are maybe checking out of office for a little bit. And it's also the time of year where we might also just be kind of calling it quits on last year. Kind of like, well, glad that's done, moving on. Or I'm going to just drop that like a hot potato and hope for better next year, right?
We get really excited about the new year and there's all that hope about how next year is going to be better, or different, or we're finally going to make those changes. But when you're only focused on what could be, you aren't taking into account the story you're dragging with you, and I really mean dragging with you, into the new year. And that's what we're going to talk about today.
It's kind of like this really heavy weight that you're walking around with, except you can't see the heavy weight. It's this invisible force that is dragging behind you, slowing you down, making you feel sluggish, and you have no idea it's there. That's why the first step in this process is to know what your current story is. You have to understand what that invisible weight is that you're dragging into the new year so you can drop it and release it, and move forward with more ease.
So thinking about what that current story is, what your story is about 2022. One of the ways I like to think about this is if you were writing a book about last year, what would the title be? If we could go to Barnes and Noble and scan the bookshelves, pull your book out, what would that title be if you had to create one for 2022? What would be the chapters that would be in that book?
And how would you, as the business owner, be portrayed as the main character? And then what about the supporting characters, maybe clients, contractors, employees, look at what their significance in the story is. And then I want you to take a moment and notice how you feel when you think about that story you're telling. A lot of times you're feeling not so great when you tell that story.
Maybe you're feeling defeated, or disappointed, or maybe there's even some regret. So we want to be aware of that starting point, that you are here point on the map. And awareness is always that first step, so start here.
Once you have awareness of your current story, you're going to decide what the story is you're going to tell yourself about the year that has just passed. This is really important for two reasons. How you intentionally decide to think about last year is actually going to determine your experience and the results you're able to create in the coming year. And that's why it's so important to do this before we ever set any new goals.
If you go back to episode three where I talk to you about the self-coaching model, you'll see why this is so important. And for those of you who need a refresher or haven't listened to that episode, let me give you a quick review. You have the neutral facts, or the circumstance, of what you did or didn't do last year. None of it is good or bad or not enough or too much, it just is what it is.
But then you, or your human brain assigns meaning to those facts. And this is where you have the opportunity to choose. This is where story is created. The facts are just the facts, it's what we make them mean that makes all of the difference. And what we make it mean is totally optional.
You get to choose what you make those facts mean about you, your business, and your future. And you get to choose the way you talk about yourself so that it serves you in 2023. So like I said, you've got your facts, your thoughts about those facts, and then your thoughts about those facts create a feeling. And those emotions are going to fuel action or inaction. And then, of course, our actions or inactions create the results that we have.
So, again, you have the circumstance or the thoughts, you have a thought about those circumstances which generates an emotion or a feeling. Which fuels your action or inaction and that produces a result.
So you can see that if you're thinking really crappy thoughts about last year, which is really just a story, a bunch of thoughts lumped together in one, you're going to get crappy results. You're going to just continue to find evidence to support that story in this coming year and then continue to create the results that you don't actually want. Most of us think that that will actually motivate us, and it is the exact opposite.
So many of my clients are used to using this internal dialogue as a source of motivation. And while it can work to some extent, it ends up burning you out and ultimately is not sustainable fuel for going after the goals you want in your business. When you're setting goals solely from a place of what you did wrong, or what didn't work, or what you didn't do, you're fueling your goal setting with judgment and pressure.
I want to compare and contrast something here, think about the types of goals you set and then the results that you get from setting goals from a feeling of pressure and the story of not good enough. When you're believing that last year wasn't good enough, the actions you're going to take for goal setting are going to be something along the lines of maybe listing out every possible thing you could ever do next year, piling on way too much work all at once and overwhelming yourself.
You maybe are treating yourself and your business as an improvement project versus something that's going to evolve and keep getting better from a place of it's already working really well. And you're going to get stressed pretty much immediately about all there is to do and how you don't have time to do any of it.
Let's contrast that to what it looks like to set a goal from the feeling of pride and the story of I made some great progress. When you're believing I made some great progress, you're going to take actions like maybe picking up on the subtleties and tweaks you could make to improve what's already going really well in your business and double down on that.
You're much more prone to be strategic and select a few key projects that will have the most impact in your business and move the needle forward without overworking. And you're going to be feeling good about taking action because you've allowed yourself to see what you've already created, what you're already capable of. And you can use that evidence to create internal motivation for yourself.
Do you see how different this is? One story keeps you stuck and spinning, the other story moves you forward powerfully. And this is why you have to decide what story you're going to tell about last year before you set goals for next year.
And if you're thinking, “I don't want to be delusional, I don't want to tell myself I did a great job when I really didn't,” I want you to question this. I'm not asking you to make up all the ways you're wonderful and invent accomplishments that aren't there. I'm asking you to see the truth of what is. There are multiple truths. It's all a story, you did some things, you didn't do some things. You really crushed it and you messed up.
I'm asking you to decide what you're going to give more attention to, because that part you're totally in control of. That is up to you. And it's going to be a determining factor in how you approach your goal setting for next year.
One of the skills I teach my clients is the skill of asking high quality questions to get high quality answers. As I've shared before, coaching or the process of coaching, whether it's from a coach or coaching yourself, is about thinking at a higher level. So to start to look at the story you want to tell about this past year, I want you to start asking yourself questions that empower you, that showcase you as the hero of your story.
You could ask yourself, what did you create or accomplish this year that did not exist the previous year? What did you learn in creating those things? And who did you get to become in the process of that creation? How have you grown as a business owner in the past year? Why are you proud of yourself? These are all great questions to be asking, and you're going to get great answers.
Instead of wasting time doubting yourself right now, I want you to start impressing yourself. There are absolutely things that went well, and when you ask yourself these questions you write a story that's going to serve you in the coming year. And decide what stories you're willing to let go of in order to create a new future for yourself.
If you want to dive deeper into reviewing your year and making a plan for next year, I encourage you to use the process of curious evaluation that I outlined in episode eight, the link will be in the show notes. When you go through this process of creating awareness around your current story and then intentionally deciding what you want to believe about last year, you are setting yourself up for success.
There's the tactical approach to setting doable achieving goals in my business that I always use and I teach my clients. But before that ever happens, I start here. You're going to feel proud and accomplished when you go through this process, which in turn creates more pride, more accomplishment, and more joy in your business. And you're going to get better results too.
As we close out another year and get ready to set goals for the coming year, this really is the best time to take a look at the stories you're telling yourself and make a conscious decision about the story you want to tell going forward. Do this exercise, I'd love to hear what comes up for you about the past, about the story you're going to tell and the future you're going to create.
In the next episode I'm going to be diving into my process for setting achievable goals, we're going to head more into the nitty gritty tactics. I can't wait to dive into that topic. It's one of my favorites. And until then I'm wishing you a beautiful week. I'll talk to you in the next episode.
---
Hey designer, I have a special announcement for you. I recently wrapped up enrollment for my six month group coaching program, Out of Overwhelm. Since closing the doors I’ve heard from several of you that with the busyness of the end the year you didn’t get around to applying or you let yourself sit in that decision limbo until it was just too late. So I’ve been thinking about you. I’m not planning to open the doors to the program again until summer 2023 and I don’t want anyone, especially you, to miss out on the opportunity to get the support you want as we head into the new year.
Out of Overwhelm is my signature six-month program designed to take you from overwhelmed and stressed to profitable, in control, and fulfilled. I’ve decided to reopen enrollment leading up to our virtual kickoff retreat on January 10th. If you love the topics I’m covering on the podcast, you are going to love out of overwhelm. It is where we take these tool and I give you a consistent structure for applying them and we create the exact results you want personally and professionally, and you get to do it all with my support alongside your peers.
So this is your official invitation to join an intimate community of designers where you’ll get my personalized feedback whenever you need it. During our group calls, our monthly focus sessions, and also with daily coaching from me within our online community platform, you’ll always be moving forward.
Head to desicreswell.com/group-coaching or click the link in the show notes for all of the details and to apply. I review the applications personally to ensure it’s the best fit. You can also request to schedule time for us to connect live so I can answer any questions you have.
With the starts of the new year there has never been better time get back in the driver sear of your business. Join me in Out of Overwhelm. Click the link in the show notes to apply and get started January 10.
---
To celebrate the launch of the show, I'm going to be giving away gift cards to Jayson Home, one of my favorite home decor sources. I'm going to be giving away $50 gift cards to five lucky listeners who follow, rate, and review the show.
Now, it doesn't have to be a five star review, although I sure hope you love the show. I want your honest feedback so I can create an amazing show that provides tons of value. Visit desicreswell.com/podcastlaunch to learn more about the contest and how to enter. I'll be announcing the winners on the show in an upcoming episode.
Thanks for joining me for this week's episode of The Interior Design Business CEO. If you want more tips, tools and strategies visit www.desicreswell.com. And if you're ready to take what you've learned on the podcast to the next level, I would love for you to check out my signature group coaching program, Out of Overwhelm.
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