56. Pep Talk: What Story Are You Rehearsing?
On this pep talk episode, we’re exploring the stories you’re rehearsing that are perpetuating stress and overwhelm in your interior design business. All of us have stories running through our minds that define who we are, how we show up, and what we think we’re capable of, and some of them simply aren’t serving you or your business.
The more you rehearse a story about yourself, the more ingrained it becomes, and the more you automatically begin to take action from that place. In essence, your stories become self-fulfilling prophecies. If your stories are producing outcomes and experiences you don’t want, it’s time to consider dropping them, and I’m showing you how.
Join me today as I invite you to examine how the stories you’re currently telling yourself might not be ones you want to keep. Hear how there is no one absolute truth about you or anyone else, why you must become conscious of how you speak about yourself, and a pep talk challenge that will help you question the stories you’ve been rehearsing.
I’m hosting a brand-new free masterclass on Friday, November 17th 2023, where I’ll be sharing the four foundational pillars you must establish and maintain to create a thriving interior design business. The Complete Roadmap to a Profitable, Efficient Interior Design Business is my gift to you, so click here to sign up!
Enrollment is currently open for Out of Overwhelm and we’re kicking off the group in January 2024. Click here to claim one of the very limited spots in the program!
What You’ll Discover from this Episode:
What rehearsed stories mean.
Why I don’t believe there’s one true story about ourselves or anyone else.
The role of your mindset in creating outcomes you may or may not want.
Examples of stories I frequently hear interior design CEOs rehearse.
How to continually question your stories and consider other truths that are available to you.
Listen to the Full Episode:
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55. Time Management Mistakes: Are You Setting Yourself Up for Failure?
Full Episode Transcript:
Welcome to The Interior Design Business CEO, the only show for designers who are ready to confidently run and grow their businesses without the stress and anxiety. If you’re ready to develop a bigger vision for your interior design business, free up your time, and streamline your days for productivity and profit, you’re in the right place. I’m Desi Creswell, an award-winning interior designer and certified life and business coach. I help interior designers just like you stop feeling overwhelmed so they can build profitable businesses they love to run. Are you ready to confidently lead your business, clients, and projects? Let’s go.
Hello designer, welcome back to the podcast. It is an exciting week here because Out Of Overwhelm officially opened for enrollment on Monday and I’ve already welcomed some incredible clients into the program. This is important for you to know because space is very limited, both for those of you who want to join the signature program and for those of you who want the group experience plus the addition of private coaching to further support you.
Because of the level of intimacy in this group, I do limit it to 15 designers, which means if you want to work with me in Out Of Overwhelm starting this January 2024, you need to get on it. I have yet to encounter a group program that is as high-touch as Out Of Overwhelm, one where I know you as a coach, what is going on in your specific business, what problems you’re solving for and having the ability to get coaching and feedback whenever you need it.
If you are a designer who wants to take control of your schedule, your business and your profits so that you can not only love your business, but also love the time you have outside of your work, this program is for you. When you join Out Of Overwhelm before the end of the day Monday November 20, you’re going to also receive a really amazing bonus. It’s a workshop with me called Marketing Made Simple.
And I’m offering this because in order to build a creatively fulfilling and profitable design business, you must know how to attract your dream clients, speak to their unique needs and confidently share your expertise and services. Whether you’ve always struggled to put yourself out there or find you need to market more than you have in recent years, this live workshop is going to ensure you’re attracting the right clients to serve your creative and financial goals. And I’m offering this now because Marketing Made Simple is the perfect complement to Out Of Overwhelm.
If you’re going to consistently market your business, you need to first take control of your calendar to create that space and mental capacity to share your work with the clients and trade partners who are ready and waiting to work with you. This bonus workshop also supports Out Of Overwhelm concepts such as creating client filters to weed out less than ideal projects, learning to confidently say no, prioritizing business growth activities and so much more. You’re not going to want to miss this.
It is the process I have used to grow multiple thriving businesses, and have previously only shared this process with private clients to create an abundance of clients they love to work with. And now it’s your turn to make marketing simple and effective. So that’s when you apply for Out Of Overwhelm before the end of the day, Monday, November 28.
Joining is very simple, the link is going to be in the show notes. And this link is going to take you to a page on my website with all of the Out Of Overwhelm information and all the details, including the 12 core topics that we cover throughout our time together. All you have to do is click the apply button on the page and fill out a really quick form.
I call this an application, but please do not be intimidated. These questions are specifically designed to, first, help you get clarity on what you want to get out of the program. And two, ensure that your goals align with what I offer so that it is a great fit all around.
Then after you submit your application, I will review it personally and respond to you via email with next steps. If you want to schedule a consultation with me, there is a place on the application to note that. So if you choose that option, I’ll send you a link to set up a live call where I can answer any of your questions and then help you reach a decision that feels right for you.
After that, if we’re moving forward with working together I’ll send you a link to pay, which secures your spot in the program. There’s options to pay in full if you want to get that expense in before the end of the calendar year for tax purposes. And also there are payment plans available if that works better for you.
If you have any questions at all about Out Of Overwhelm, you can of course schedule that complimentary consultation or send me a DM on Instagram at Desi Creswell, or even just reply to one of the emails that I’ve sent out. I’ll make sure you’re all set with the details you need and answer any questions you have so that you can make an empowered decision about how you want to move forward.
Enrollment is only open for a few weeks. And, like I said, space is very limited. So you want to get your application in now. Maybe even pause the episode, click the link and take care of it right now.
Okay, let’s dive into today’s pep talk, and it’s all about the stories you’re rehearsing that are perpetuating problems in your design business. If you’ve been listening for a while, you’ve probably gathered that I love words, I love language. And sometimes I like to look up definitions of things. So I thought I’m going to look up what is the definition of a story before we get started.
What I found was so interesting and so pertinent to this pep talk, I had to share it. One source defined a story as a narrative, either true or fictitious. And the other definition said a story is an account of imaginary or real people and events.
I love this because when we are rehearsing stories about ourselves, meaning how we speak and think about ourselves, we’re thinking they’re true, just like the definition said, as an option of it could be real, it could be true. But what I want you to consider today with today’s pep talk, is what if there’s no single truth about ourselves?
What if the stories that we rehearse about ourselves are, in fact, fictitious or imaginary? Personally, I think there is no one true story about ourselves or anyone else. And today, I really invite you to consider that the stories you’ve been rehearsing about yourself, the things you say about yourself, the things that you categorize yourself as might not be ones you want to keep. And you have that as an available option to let that story go.
Now, why is this topic of rehearsing stories so important? Let me tell you why. This is important because you will act according to the way you speak about yourself and your circumstances. The more you rehearse and repeat a story about yourself or your circumstances, the more ingrained it becomes and the more you automatically begin to take action from those stories.
In essence, the stories you rehearse become self-fulfilling prophecies. The stories you rehearse will create the results that you have and the experience that you have in your business. I shared an example of this in last week’s episode on time management mistakes.
If you’re rehearsing the story I’m not in control of my time, you’re going to then be much less likely to set expectations about when you meet with clients. Or maybe you do but as soon as they ask for a Saturday appointment you say, see, I’m not in control of my time and you schedule that Saturday meeting, further perpetuating the story you’re rehearsing of I’m not in control of my time.
This is why before we dive into the strategies for managing your business in Out Of Overwhelm we start with mindset. Because mindset is a collection of thoughts you have, a collection of stories if you will, that are producing outcomes and experiences you may or may not want. In Out Of Overwhelm, and today here on the podcast, we’re talking about stories that create results you don’t want or simply aren’t serving you and the business you want to build.
I’m going to share some examples of stories I hear designers frequently rehearse, and I want you to notice if these are your stories, too. What are the stories you’re rehearsing? Maybe they’re going to be here in the examples, maybe it’s going to spark something else. But let me give these just as a starting point.
Often I’ll hear stories pertaining to time. This is so common, of course, for the clients that join me in Out Of Overwhelm. But I’ll hear stories such as I’m always in panic mode, or I’m always behind, or I never have enough time. Or I’ll hear stories rehearsed about business skills or your capacity, your capability to run a successful business, such as I’m bad at marketing or sales. Or everyone else knows more, or everyone else is doing it right. I’m wrong, I’m doing something wrong.
Often there’s stories about money. Like it’s hard to make money or I’m bad at managing money. Or even stories about how you have to show up in your business. Like I always have to be on, it always falls on me, or I should be farther along. I could go on and on. There are so many common stories I hear rehearsed among my designer clients.
There are so many examples, and I’m not saying this to say anything’s wrong with you for having these stories. I’m sharing these examples to bring your awareness to the stories and decide if you want to keep rehearsing them or not. If you want to keep perpetuating the results from telling yourself those stories again and again.
In today’s pep talk, I want you to start noticing what stories are you rehearsing? Start listening to your thoughts. You probably aren’t even aware of them right now, but once we start to build this awareness, you will become attune to what those sentences are that are continually running through your brain defining who you are, how you show up, and what you’re capable of.
Become conscious of the way that you speak about yourself and your business out loud, it really matters. And once you have that awareness, I want you to start questioning it. Get curious. Where did that story even come from? Maybe it came from a family member and you just adopted it as true. Maybe it’s coming from society, or maybe even the design industry as a whole. It might be a common narrative.
Another question you can ask yourself is, when I rehearse this particular story, what do I do or not do? And what’s the result of that? Do you like what happens when you rehearse the story or is it holding you back or will it hold you back in the future?
And if the story you’re rehearsing is preventing you from having the life and business you want, this is an opportunity to challenge and dismantle that story. I want you to start poking holes in that story. Look for how the story might not be true. Look for how even maybe the opposite of that story could be true. Make your brain work a little bit on this and see what happens.
Now for all of you who are listening and thinking, but what if I am behind on a deadline? Or what if my office really is disorganized? Or I have been avoiding the financials in my business for the past six months, maybe longer. Yes, there might be some habits you want to change, some things in your business you want to alter. That is totally valid.
And at the same time, rehearsing the story about the way you are or the way it is, is only going to perpetuate what it is that you don’t want. Beginning to think about yourself and change the way that you’re talking about yourself will change the things you want to change in your business.
This is very counter to what we typically experience when we’re in a society where we think that being harsh and judging and speaking about ourselves in this negative way is what’s going to motivate us into action. But it’s not a sustainable mode of change, and so dropping the story really is your first step.
I like to think of stories kind of like a Jenga tower. Often we’ve built really solid identity structures around beliefs, around those stories we tell. So we have to pull them apart. We need to poke those holes, like I said, and make them crumble. And sometimes we’re pulling block by block for a while and the tower is getting weaker, it’s a little less stable until that crumble happens.
But sometimes the tower falls very quickly. It might be a shaky story and it might not have much validity once you take a look at it. So whether the tower falls quickly, the story dismantles quickly or not, if you do the mindset work of questioning the story, the tower will fall and you will be released from its hold.
This is why it’s so important to have a coach so that you can have someone that sees the stories not as fact, but as a story and can reflect them back to you and offer other perspectives and question the validity of that story.
When I work with clients, I am that mirror of reflection. And I also teach them the skills to do this reflective process and looking at beliefs and deciding on purpose what we want to believe so that they have that as a skill set that they take with them into their business forever. And that is profound because there is no one absolute truth about you, your business, your skills. And that is the one true story.
So here is the pep talk challenge for you this week. Notice a story you’ve been rehearsing. Notice when it comes up and gently tell yourself, nope, we are not doing that today. Keep noticing and then start to look for evidence that the story might not be true. And consider the possibility of letting that story go.
And if it feels like you can’t quite let it go, that’s interesting to look at too. Why do you want to fight for that story? And also know that the story doesn’t have to vanish completely, but you can choose to stop engaging with it and stop rehearsing it.
You can allow yourself to see that other truths are available, and those truths could support you in taking the action towards creating a business and life with the goals that are really in alignment with how you want to show up fully and in a way that lifts you up and expresses your full potential as a business owner.
That is what I have for you today. In the next episode, I’m going to be sharing an interview with a long-term client of mine, Isabella Patrick. Isabella shares so much in this conversation about her evolution as a design business owner and leader working with her best fit clients and growing her team in her New York based firm.
And, of course, Isabella is going to share her experience working with me in Out Of Overwhelm, so you’ll get a little sneak behind the curtain as well. You are not going to want to miss us, it is such a value packed conversation. And if you aren’t already a subscriber to the podcast, do that now. Click that little plus sign at the top, follow the show so the episode pops into your feed as soon as it’s released next Wednesday.
And one last reminder that Out Of Overwhelm is open for enrollment. So you can click the link in the show notes so you can get all of the details, submit your application and begin your work with me in January of 2024. Until then, I am wishing you a beautiful week. I’ll talk to you in the next episode.
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Thanks for joining me for this week’s episode of The Interior Design Business CEO. If you want more tips, tools and strategies visit www.desicreswell.com. And if you’re ready to take what you’ve learned on the podcast to the next level, I would love for you to check out my signature group coaching program, Out of Overwhelm.
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